Baseball is in full swing. Which means it’s time to unveil Man Love for 2008. I hate the term Man Crush. It reaks of infatuation. I love men. Well professional male athletes. Baseball allows Man Love to be a relentless affair for damn near eight months, which just doesn’t compete with any other sport. You have the option to watch your new beau six days a week till October. That is some real quality time. Also, Man Love has much to do with age. There won’t be a single dude on this list over 25. And you have to be good looking. Gayness has zero to do with this, but lets get serious who wants to openly cheer for a ghoul (Vernon Wells). Enough gay banter, here is the list… in no particular order.
Johnny Cueto – Kid can deal. Flat deal. Three plus pitches, sweet name and a nice young face. Makings of a real ace for the next decade. Absolutely fearless and the numbers back it up. What’s not to love really? 29 K jobs to three BB’s in four starts on the bump! Love the sexy WHIP (.72). Johnny C just has no trepidations about challenging anyone. Which is truly unreal considering he's on the light side of 22. Clearly there will be bumps in the road, but the dominant starts will far outweigh the troublesome ones. The Reds are a squad on the rise. (Not on this list… Jay Bruce, Edison Volquez, Homer Bailey. They qualify, but a combination of ugliness (Volquez), ineptitude (Bailey), and zero time in the show (Bruce) led to their disqualification.
Johnny Cueto – Kid can deal. Flat deal. Three plus pitches, sweet name and a nice young face. Makings of a real ace for the next decade. Absolutely fearless and the numbers back it up. What’s not to love really? 29 K jobs to three BB’s in four starts on the bump! Love the sexy WHIP (.72). Johnny C just has no trepidations about challenging anyone. Which is truly unreal considering he's on the light side of 22. Clearly there will be bumps in the road, but the dominant starts will far outweigh the troublesome ones. The Reds are a squad on the rise. (Not on this list… Jay Bruce, Edison Volquez, Homer Bailey. They qualify, but a combination of ugliness (Volquez), ineptitude (Bailey), and zero time in the show (Bruce) led to their disqualification. 
Zach Greinke – Definitely a member of Man Love 2004 at the supple age of 21. Started 24 games that season and posted an ERA under four for the hapless Roy-als with Cheese. Now, Greinke has matured into the oldest of the Fab Four on this list. He will be 24, b-day (Oct. ??), for all of 2008 unless KC turns into Wild Thing Rick Vaughn, Willie Mays Hayes and the rest of the Injuns from Major League 1 & 2. For the record, Greinke is by no means an Adonis, but he has boyish charm. And who doesn't love that. Kid has been filthy so far and I don’t see him letting up. Only thing to keep my main man from competing for the AL Cy Young is if he wigs out again and falls into a yawning chasm of depression. Deeper than some lame EMO queen who cuts himself in the dark listening to Panic at the Disco! It could happen.
Justin Upton – The next Ken Griffey Jr... J-Up will be “The Kid” from 1996-99 when he was blasting damn near 50 a year with 150+ RBI, 15-20 SB, and a .285-300 average (might want to curve it though since Griffey was no doubt on the dope.) Twenty years young and taking the league by storm. Player is a physical specimen and can flat rake. There’s not much more to say. Although, would love to see him start running. How lovely will it be to watch CB Young and Upton making up two-thirds of the D-Back outfield for the next 10 years. Hands down the Rookie of the Year in the NL. J-Up is just too compact and quick at the plate to regress. Plus he’s an absolute sponge. Already a different player from end of last year to Opening Day to April 22. 
Alex Gordon – What a tasty treat so far. See a lot of David Wright in his game. Of course Gordon does hit from the left side, but I see the combo of power and speed. Everyone knows the lefty swing is a work of moving art so he's got that over his 3-bag counterpart. Not quite D-Wright defensively; however, the guy is nothing short of a Greek God. A legit candidate for 30/30. Not out of the question for 100 run/ 100 RBI at some point soon considering the ever-improving KC lineup. (Only qualm: would love to see more patience at the plate. Four BB to 15 K’s in 19 games in 2008. Whiffed 137! in ’07 in 151 matches. Not doubt in my monkey brain those numbers will improve.) Also, might need to improve his looks a bit. Nothing serious, perhaps some scruffiness and a sweet hair style. I've noticed the hair is already desheveling...Nice.Honorable Mention Man Lovers (All worthy selections): Hanley Ramirez, Ryan Braun, Jose Reyes, Grady Sizemore, B.J. Upton, Curtis Granderson, Fausto Carmona, Lastings Milledge, Adam Jones, Troy Tulowitzki, CB Young, Evan Longoria, J. R. Towles, Mark Reynolds, Hunter Pence, Joe Mauer, Ryan Zimmerman, Delmon Young, Howie Kendrick, Jeff Francoeur, Matt Kemp, Cole Hamels, Justin Verlander, Scott Kazmir, King Felix (although ugly, makes up for it in many ways), Tim Lincecum (see Felix), Frankie Liriano, Huston Street, Chad Billingsley, Carlos Marmol, Dustin McGowan, Phillipe Hughes, Clay Buchholz, Micah Owings, Conor Jackson, Nick Markakis, Jacoby Ellsbury, Carlos Gomez.
Too ugly: Yunel Escobar, Casey Kotchman, Tom Gorzellany, Matt Garza, Jonathan Broxton, Matt Cain, Yovani Gallardo, Manny Corpas, Joba Chamberlain, Jered Weaver, Ervin Santana, Dana Eveland, Edison Volquez, Justin Germano, Jair Jurrjens, Ian Kinsler
(Wow. This got out of hand. This will have to be continued at some point. Man Love 2008 Part II is on the horizon.)
